A New Year Brings New Adventures

As I look back on 2014 I have many emotions come back at once.

There have been times of challenge, like getting through grad school while working full time. There have been times of extreme heartache and heartbreak, like when my best friend's husband passed away unexpectedly.  There have been times that took my breath away, like seeing those 2 lines on the pregnancy test. And there have been times that reminded me of God's amazing love, like hearing Marisa's heartbeat for the first time.
2014 has brought great sorrow and great joy. It has been a true Rollercoaster ride.

As I look towards 2015, I look with excitement in my heart and a smile on my face. I know that it will come with its own set of challenges and adventures- times of sorrow and of joy. But, with 2015 comes the time when I see Marisa's sweet face for the first time and get to watch Milly and Shelby take on the roles of big sisters. What I'm most excited for is seeing Jake become a daddy to a two-legged. I know he will be amazing.

I want to take this time to thank all of my friends, family, and coworkers for their love and support in 2014. You have truly brought me so much joy.

Thank you especially to Jake and the MilShelb, the three that fill my heart and keep me going every day. You love me more than I deserve and I am forever greatful for your love.

Here's to another year and many more adventures!

Day 14 of 30 Day Challenge

Describe 5 strengths you have.

Well, I'm a pretty strong person... so, in no particular order...

1. I am good at teaching. I know how to teach and I love it!

2. Being a MilShelb Mom. They may be my weakness, but being their mom is my strength. I stand up for them, put them first, act as an advocate for them, and keep them safe. I'm a good MilShelb Mom.

3. Being a wife. I don't get it right all the time, but I think the fact that I'm still happily married after nearly 5 years says a lot. (Or maybe I just have a really good husband. Takes two, ya know.)

4. DIY skills. I'm a great DIYer. (Just don't ask the H. LOL!)

5. Finishing what I started. That's not a strength I see in many people these days. But, I am great at finishing what I start. No use in starting if you don't plan to finish.

Day 13 of 30 Day Challenge

Describe 5 weaknesses you have.

Ok, in no particular order:

1. Milly and Shelby. Those little dogs are my heartbeat at my feet. They can do no wrong (and even if they do, I'm still hooked and don't care). Their sweet brown eyes just melt my heart.

2. The H. Here's another who can do no wrong. Ok. That's not true. (Laugh with me here, folks.) But, he smiles his smile and it doesn't matter. He's my best friend and I love him.

3. Sour gummy worms. Yep. I said it. I love those things. I can eat myself sick on those.

4. People with "broken wings." This is a big one. I always end up feeling sorry for people I shouldn't feel sorry for and want to help them however I can.

5. The snooze button. I press that thing every single morning. Most of the time more than once. I have a weakness for sleep!

Day 12 of 30 Day Challenge

Describe a typical day in your life

This very thought cracks me up because teachers don't have "typical" days. The only thing typical about the life of a teacher is that it's not typical. 

But, I'll do my best.

5:00am- alarm goes off, hit snooze

5:09am- alarm goes off again, hit snooze again (my poor husband)

5:18am- possibly get out of bed

5:20am- shower, get dressed and ready for work

6:00am (if I'm lucky)- out the door

6:35am (if I'm lucky)- arrive at work

Fast forward a few hours through the not typical part

At some point I get home.

Play ball with Milly in the yard

Make dinner

Eat dinner

Watch tv

Pick clothes for next day

Bed around 8:30

Phew!

Day 11 of 30 Day Challenge

Describe a few of your pet peeves. 

Well, I have to say that I have some pet peeves... Quite a few of them!

I cannot stand for people to sniffle. Seriously?! BLOW your nose!!

It drives me crazy when grown adults write the wrong "there, their, or they're." Really, it's basic emelentary grammar, folks ! 

Whining is absolutely not tolerated. I cannot take whining. Especially from adults.

My number one pet peeve is probably when people make excuses for their behavior or choices. Just own it already. As my mother says, "they've got the same 24 hours in their day that I've got in mine."

I could go on... But I think I'll start to sound like a psycho! Lol! 

Popcorn Be Gone!

The H and I have talked for years about getting rid of the popcorn ceilings in our house. We hate them. They're dated, ugly, and ( let's face it) you can't clean them! 

So today I decided to try my hand at popcorn removal. I've looked at YouTube videos and blogs by other DIYers and I figured if they can do it so can I. 

They warn you it's messy, so I put trash bags over the counter and toilet. 

It did no good. I didn't tape, though. I should have taped. Oh well. Live and learn. 

It's a tiny half bath. Here's part of it before. 

And the other part before. 

Hers the tools I used: 

A step ladder (I'm only 5 ft 1), a bottle of water and vinegar, and a scrapey tool I grabbed from the garage. 

About half way through the scraping process...

All done with the scraping process! If you get this stuff really good and wet it just comes right off. But a warning- the goopier it is, the more it sticks to the floor.

What a mess I had on my hands (and hair, shorts, shirt, face, floor, walls... You get the picture)!

That junk was everywhere!! 

So I swept it up.

And then washed the ceiling, walls, counter, toilet, fixtures, and floor.

I am really proud of myself and can't wait to paint! Might even get to that tomorrow! 

Day 9 of 30 Day Challenge

Day 9- What defines you?

I am defined by many things. I am defined by the people who love me. I am defined by the job I do. I am defined by the words that come out of mouth. I am defined by my actions and reactions. I am defined by the things I allow to be a part of my life. I am defined by the choices I make. I am defined by my love for God. I am defined by His unfailing love for me.

Day 8 of 30 Day Challenge

Day 8- What are three passions you have?

Passion is defined as: a strong and barely controllable emotion (according to google)

I tend to be pretty passionate about anything I take the time to do. If I'm not going to do it well, I honestly don't bother doing it at all. But, my top three passions are (in no ranking order other than being the top three):

1. MilShelb. Yes. I'm pathetic. Milly and Shelby are my passion and my obsession. I love my girls. I really just can't explain it.

2. Animal welfare. In my dream world all pets would have homes and none would suffer and none would be abandoned, neglected, alone, or afraid. I am passionate about animals. They give us so much and in return, people dump them, abuse them, starve them... and worse. It is horrible. There are so many things wrong with this. I cannot sit here and write a blog to truly express my passion on this subject because it would take me hours.

3. Public Education. I am a third grade teacher in a public school. I love my job. I love my kids. I love my fellow teachers and my administrators. My dream is for all children in the US to have the opportunity to attend school in a place that is safe, warm, updated.... full of books, computers, and caring teachers. Many students in the US do not have the opportunities that my students have. I know because I've taught in one of those schools. Those children deserve an excellent education just as all children do.

Day 7

Well, I told you I stink at keeping up with these things. 

Today I'm writing Day 7: what is your dream job and why?

I am truly blessed because I am one of the lucky few who actually gets to work her dream job. I teach third grade. I love my job with all my heart. There are great days and there are tough days, but the good far outweighs the bad.

So, why is this my dream job?

1. There's never a dull moment with children. 

2. That look on a kid's face when they finally get something.

3. The hugs at the end of the day... Or just because.

4. (And most important) Because what I do makes a difference every single day. It needs to because I'm trading a day of my life for it. 

Day 6 of 30 Day Challenge

I told y'all I stink at these things... And I was right. Self-fulfilling prophesy, I suppose.

Anyhow, day 6 asks what is the worst thing you've ever experienced.

The worst thing? Normally when I look back at my life I see many happy times, a few challenging times... But I don't ever focus on the bad/sad times. Sure, I've had them just like everyone else, but why dwell on them?

But, since it asks, the worst thing I've ever experienced was having my cat put to sleep. I got Willow when I was five and she was a kitten. I loved that cat so much. I had her until I was a junior in high school. (I think. My brain is mush.) she was very sick and had a horrible growth on her side. We didn't have options because she was older and they'd already tried once to remove all the bad cells, so we (my mom and I) talked about it and felt it was best to let her go. When I think about it I remember that day vividly. It was horrible. It still sends a pain through my heart and a knot in my stomach that makes me feel sick. I miss her. I think I always will. That day made me think I'd never have another pet, but that's not fair. In reality, Willow taught me that I am strong enough to do hard things and make hard choices, and that I did love her enough to do what was right by her. 

I like to think Milly and Shelby will live forever, but I know that's not true... and I dread that day. Loss hurts. It's heart breaking. It never really goes away. But love is better than loss and happiness is a much stronger emotion than sadness, and I can do hard things. 

Day 5 of the 30 Day Challenge

Day 5- 5 things that make you the happiest right now

1. The H

2. The MilShelb

3. Routine

4. My students

5. My team of teachers

Day 4 of the 30 Day Challenge

Day 4- 5 things I'd tell my 16 year old self if I could.

If I could tell my 16 year old self anything, it'd be:

1. The guy in your life won't matter at all in the future. Seriously, you end up with an amazing man!

2. Don't stop working hard. In your life, hard work pays off again and again.

3. You'll miss your Mama when you leave for college and since you don't ever live at home again, you'd better not take the time with her for granted.

4. Things really will work out and the rest of your life is not nearly as dramatic as high school. 

5. Think long and hard about decisions before you make them. I'm not saying Id do anything differently because it led me to where I am now, but think long and hard.

Day 3 of 30 Day Challenge

I knew I'd get behind...

Day 3- What's the greatest amount of physical pain you've ever endured?

Well, when I was in sixth grade I found out I have Scoliosis. That's a curve in your spine, for those of you who don't know. I wore a back brace for a few years. When I was in high school I had surgery for it. It was not fun! It was very painful and a long road to recovery. But, I made it through and I'm fine now! 

30 Day Challenge- Day 2 (because I know I'll get behind)

Day 2- 3 legitimate fears and how they became your fears

Fear 1-
I am scared to death of one of the MilShelb getting hit by a car or hurt in a way I cannot fix. I want them to only know happiness and health... I truly fear them being tragically hurt. I fear them being hurt and it being a result of my negligence. (I certainly don't purposefully put them in harm's way. I don't want anyone to get that idea! These are probably 2 of the most protected dogs on earth. I'm pretty much a helicopter parent. So is the H.)

Fear 2-
I'm extremely afraid of my house catching on fire. Seriously. If I even think I may have left something "dangerous" plugged in (like my hair straightener) I will drive all the way back home to check. Again, this fear really goes back to Milly and Shelby. I would absolutely die if they were caught in a house fire. (As for how I got this fear- a horrible tragedy from a fellow blogger. Many of her dogs died in a horrible house fire and she wrote a blog about how she could hear them but couldn't help them... ripped my heart out!)

Fear 3-
(I know I'm supposed to post 3 fears, but I really only have the 2...)

30 Day Challenge- Day 1

Ten Random Facts About Myself:
1. I rewash loads of clothes more than I should admit... because I forget I washed them in the first place. In fact, if you see me in clean clothes you should probably give me a medal because it means I actually remembered to put the things in the drier in a decent amount of time.
2. I run the drier more times than I should admit as well. I don't iron, so I have to run it over and over to remove wrinkles. LOL
3. I like to read, but I have a hard time sitting down and reading anything for any length of time.
4. I am obsessed with my dogs... the MilShelb (the reason for this blog).
5. I watch way too much of HGTV and DIY channels. Seriously, sometimes for hours at a time.
(I realize I'm currently sounding like the laziest person on earth- but I promise I'm not. I really am not a sorry excuse for a human being.)
(Let me change your mind.)
6. I coach Girls on the Run.
7. I teach third grade (with passion... LOVE my job)!
8. I would redecorate my house every other week if my wallet (and husband) would allow it. (Maybe I should have listened to my mother and been an interior designer.)
9. I've had the same 2 best friends for my whole life. No really. I'm not exaggerating. My whole life (minus the first 2 months).
10. After nearly 5 years of marriage and 8 years together I am still hopelessly in love with my husband.

30 Day Challenge

I'll admit I stole this from a random blog...

Day 1: List 10 random facts about yourself.

Day 2: Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and describe how they became fears.

Day 3: What is the greatest amount of physical pain you have ever endured?

Day 4: List 5 things you would tell your 16 year-old self if you could.

Day 5: What are the 5 things that make you happiest right now?

Day 6: What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?

Day 7: What is your dream job, and why?

Day8: What are 3 passions you have?

Day 9: What defines you?  

Day 10: Describe your most embarrassing moment.

Day 11: Describe a few of your pet peeves.

Day12: Describe a typical day in your life.

Day 13: Describe 5 weaknesses you have.

Day 14: Describe 5 strengths you have.

Day 15: If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

Day 16: What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?

Day 17: What is the thing you most wish you were great at?

Day 18: What is the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?

Day 19: If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?

Day 20: Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.

Day 21: If you could have 1 superpower, what would it be and what wouldbe the first thing you did with it?

Day 22: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?

Day 23: List your top 3 hobbies and why you love them.

Day 24: Describe your first job.

Day 25: If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it beand what would you eat?

Day 26: What popular notion do you think the world has wrong?

Day 27: What is your favorite part of your body and why?

Day 28: What is your love language?

Day 29: What were your three favorite toys/games as a child?

Day 30: List 5 things you would hope to be remembered for.

Steps in the Right Direction

"If you want to get over a problem, stop talking about it. Your mind affects your mouth, and your mouth affects your mind. It's difficult to stop talking about a situation until you stop thinking about it." -Joyce Meyer
(I'm no Joyce Meyer fan or anything, but I found this quote on Pinterest and loved it.)

In my last post I talked about needing to let things go. I am actually feeling much better about these things because I've stopped thinking about one of them and am pretty close to the other one. Now, I know that saying I never think about these things is a lie. But, I am not constantly thinking about these things anymore. Occasionally I catch myself heading in that direction and just force myself to change my thoughts and think of other things.

I think one reason I was thinking of these things so much is because I was talking about these things so much. My thoughts and conversations were consumed by these things. I've just changed the topic when these things come up.

I really am feeling much better already.

I've also prayed about being able to let these things go. I've prayed to not let them consume my thoughts and conversations. I actually laid down last night to go to sleep and felt completely at peace for the first time in a long time. It was a great feeling. And, I thanked God for it. Really, I did.

Thinking Aloud

"Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions."

There are many things I need to let go. There are two main things that, honestly, eat at me. Some days they consume my thoughts and make me so mad I want to yell at the people who have caused these things... but I can't. Mainly because neither issue is really any of my business.

What? You're wondering how I can be so passionate about something that is none of my business? Can't we all? I think so. These are things that annoy me, drive me crazy... honestly, they make me feel like there is so much injustice in the world. Or maybe just that there are innocent people involved in both of these situations that can't do anything about it. Neither can I. I can only sit by and watch and pick my jaw up off the floor occasionally... but nothing else.

Last night I wrote about repenting. About how you have to let things go and let God deal with them. About how I have such a hard time doing that. These are two things I must let go. I have to for the sake of my own sanity- my own inner peace. The problem is (and not that I'm making excuses) these things have been going on for years. I have had them in my thoughts, prayers, and conversations for years. They have been (many days) the center of my concern. So, you see, it's hard to just drop it.

So, now before I work on repenting for not giving this stuff to God, I'll be working on not thinking and talking about these things all the time. I think that's the first step.

Chaos and Crazniess

Many people who know me know that I live my life in a constant state of chaos and craziness. I am always on the go. Always.

There are days, however, when I am just completely exhausted from the chaos that is my life.

Today is one of those days.

I am tired of and from many things going on my life. Things I won't talk about to people I don't know... but things I can't necessarily do anything about. I have a problem with letting things go. I know I cannot change them. I know I cannot make some things better or different, but I still hold on to those things.

I have started reading an online devotional (http://www.lilyandlight.com/2013/01/make-me-over2013-repent.html) and the first night (tonight) was "repent". Repenting really means you need to admit what you're doing wrong and turn from it and do better. I know that. I've known that. I know what I'm doing "wrong" (for lack of a better word) but I don't know how to turn from it. How do you turn from constantly having things on your mind that don't allow you to have your mind on the right things? You're supposed to not worry. Give it to God, so they say. I have a hard time with that. That's what I really need to repent of, is not letting God be in charge. Now, I know He is in charge but I am over here trying to do things all by myself and that's just not possible. It's like the old saying goes something like, "We plan and God laughs." There's just so much going on and I need to let Him deal with it. I need to trust that it will all work out in His time and with His plan, but I am having such a hard time with giving it up.

So, how do you give that up? How do you give it all to God?

Just my thoughts for tonight...