It's No Big Secret

It's no big secret... I love my husband. I really really do. I am his biggest fan. I think he is amazing. He is generous, loving, funny, goofy, brilliant... all sort of good things. Maybe what you don't know is that I believe that God sent him to me. He and I were made for each other. God gave me him for the ups and downs. God gave me him for the days of doubt. God gave me a wonderful man to share my life with. I am blessed to be his wife.
You know what's funny? People don't get us. We're not your typical lovie-dovie, mooshy-smooshy, kissy-huggy couple. That's not us. We're not attached at the hip. We don't feel the need to ask permission for things. We don't have to hang out constantly. We live our lives exactly as we want and it just works. It works perfectly for us. People think we're odd. They think it's strange... but it really doesn't bother either one of us because we know that we love each other. We know that our relationship is solid and strong. We trust each other. More than one person has said to me that we seem more like roommates than husband and wife. I see their point. It's true, I suppose, because we do not have the typical relationship. The thing is that people just do not understand. Someone else recently said that you just have to do what is best for your marriage and forget what others think. That's so true. I love Jake. I know that God sent him to me because I need him. I am independent and I love to do things on my own. I love to work things out alone and I hate having to check in with someone. I love a simple goodnight text if I'm not home yet and not a million minute phone call. I love being able to just look at Jake and know with all of my heart that that man loves me more than he loves himself. I don't need other people to approve of our relationship. God approves. I approve. Jake approves. As far as I'm concerned, that's all the matters.

It's Amazing... or Is It?

It's amazing what a little church can do for a person. I'll admit it- I have not been going to church like I should since I moved back to Columbia. However, I have gone for the last three (yes, three) Sundays in a row. How great it is to go to church and learn about God and praise Him and thank Him for the many blessings in my life. How great it is to know that God (the one, true, awesome, wonderful God) loves me... me... a sinner. 


I know that some people do not believe that God sends you places and they rely on the idea of coincidence. I don't believe in coincidence. God sends me places and puts people in my life for a reason. Nothing is a mistake in God's world. Everything is part of a bigger plan. Anyhow, the first Sunday, I'm tellin' ya, the preacher was preaching directly to me. And, do you know what that told me? That told me that God was saying, "See, Maggie, I told you that you needed to be here. I sent you here. So, hear this message, no matter how uncomfortable it may be." Anyhow, I try to be a giving and loving person. I try very hard. I give to others. But, you know what, I don't love enough. And, giving to others is not the same as loving them. God showed us that when you love someone you will sacrifice on their behalf. Those were the preacher's exact words, "when you love someone you will sacrifice on their behalf." What a smack in the face. I needed that. I thought to myself, "Yes, God, I hear you. I hear you loud and clear. I have been selfish. I will obey. I will sacrifice on their behalf." 


You see, I have been having a hard time lately. I have been struggling with some things... call them growing pains, I suppose. I keep waking up and remembering that I am an adult now. Yuck. And I am responsible for my actions and reactions. I am responsible for my family. I am responsible for my soul. 


Yes. I hear You, God. I hear you and I am working on it. It's not an immediate thing... but I will get there. I will be strong enough to do the right thing... no matter what others think. I will live a life that is pleasing to You... or die trying.

I Love My Family

This picture was taken last Christmas on Christmas morning. It's funny to look back at pictures, even ones from only a year ago, and see how much things have changed. 
In this picture (from left to right) is my Mom, my older sister Morgan, her husband James, my aunt Debi, her boyfriend Lou, my younger sister Danielle, and my (step) dad Michael. On the front row is my husband Jake, me, and my grandma (Grandmama). 
This Christmas is Morgan and James' time to go with his family. I really miss them when they're not with us for holidays, but I understand. My sister Danielle got married this summer and her husband, John, will be joining us this Christmas as well. They are expecting a baby (in like 4 or 5 months)... see, things change. 
I am excited for Christmas this year. I went shopping yesterday and cannot wait to give the gifts I have bought so far. I really put a lot of thought into gifts and love to see people's reactions when they open them. I have bought some good ones so far, so I am really excited!

Thanksgiving

What I'm thankful for:

The less serious things-

1. Those awesome cookies with tons of icing from Walmart. Those things are awesome!

2. Clothes fresh out of the dryer on a cold day.

3. Sales on things I really want (which means I can finally afford it!!)

4. Picture frames. I love displaying pictures.

5. Diet Coke. I LOVE that stuff.

6. Blankets. I always feel better with a blanket. lol

The semi-serious things-

1. Sunny days. No matter the temperature, sitting in the sun is always nice. Makes me feel like I have a connection with heaven.

2. A house to live in... a roof over my head... a fence in my yard.

3. My job. This time last year I was not so lucky and I am blessed to have a job.

4. Food to eat. Clothes to wear... all that stuff people need.

The more serious things-

1. My family. I have an amazing family. 

2. My husband. I know God created us for one another because, honestly, no one else could put up with either of us. lol

3. My MilShelb. These two have made me a better person. Yeah, they're dogs... but grace comes in strange forms and they have taught me so much.

4. My friends. I have terrific friends. They keep me sane (and normally with a smile on my face).

5. The people I work with. I am getting to know these people more and am truly beginning to love them. They all have something interesting and important to add to my life. I am lucky to know them.

6. Whitney. (I know, how unfair, I'm singling a friend out, but, let's be fair.) She's encouraged me to get back into the swing of things with going to church. She is awesome. Thank you, Whitney, for reminding me what is important in life... and it's nothing of this world.

I am truly a blessed person. When I'm standing right in the middle of the chaos that is my life, it's very easy to lose sight of that... but I truly am blessed and thankful beyond belief. My God is an AWESOME God. He has blessed my life in many ways I never believed possible nor thought probable. I am so glad. He has made me glad...

Today is a Sad Day

My parents have to take Angel (the cat) to be put to sleep. It is such a sad thing. She is very old and not doing well. She has lost a pound in one week (and one pound is a big deal because she is already way too skinny). She has not been able to eat right or (as of last night) even walk. Mom called last night to tell me hat she will be gone today. So, to Angel...

Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. 

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. 
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. 
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. 

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. 
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. 

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. 

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. 

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together.... 

Author unknown...

A Week Before Thanksgiving

It's a week before Thanksgiving and I've decided I'll post something I'm thankful for each day until Thanksgiving.

So, today I am thankful for my MilShelb. They keep me sane. They are my heart. Love that MilShelb!!

Day 4: Your Sibling(s)

Dear Morgan and Danielle,
Things sure have changed since we were little. Here we are, all married... one about to have a baby... life is different. I am so thankful to have had you both in my life. I am thankful to know what it is like to have sisters. You two are so different; we all are. You make me smile. You make me laugh. At times, you make me want to scream and maybe even ask if you need a reality check... but you are my sisters and I love you. I am so thankful for your love and support. I am thankful for the advice you give and the advice you (kindly) accept from me even when you're not asking for it at all.
I am looking forward to all of the changes that will continue to come our way. Babies, new homes, new pets, moves... everything. I am excited to see what the future holds for each of you.
Love you so much,
Maggie

Day 3: Your Parents

(I skipped day 2 because I don't really have a "crush". lol)


Dear Mom and Michael,
I am blessed to have you as parents. You are generous and loving people. You have taught me a lot about life. You taught me to love God and put Him first. You taught me to love other people whether they deserve it or not. You taught me to bite my tongue and smile... even when I don't want to. You taught me to stand up for myself and to be independent. 
Thank you for a wonderful childhood. Thank you for your sacrifices. Thank you for making our family a priority. Thank you for loving me.
Love, Maggie

Day 1: Your Best Friend

Dear Katie,
You are awesome! You make me laugh. You tell me like it is. You keep my head in the game, so to speak. You are amazing. 
It is so great to have a friend that knows me... really knows me... and still loves me just for exactly who I am. You and I have many great memories together. We have had our share of good times and bad times, but I think we both know that we are not "fair weather friends", but the kind of friends that make it through thick and thin. 
I am thankful for you. I am thankful for your friendship. I am thankful for everything you have added to my life. 
I miss you all the time. I wish we still lived in the same town. It's hard to not see you as often as I'd like, but I truly love the time we get to spend together.


Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being awesome. Thank you for standing by me and pushing me to be my best.


I love you, my Katie.

This looks Like Fun!

WRITE A LETTER TO THESE PEOPLE :

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

Day 2 — Your Crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Of course, I never keep up with these things... but I'll give this one a shot. lol

The Best Part About Owning A Dog

I saw this and it inspired this post....


The best part about owning a dog:

• is pulling up in the driveway and seeing their little heads pop up over the edge of the back of the couch.
• is walking in the door to two wiggly bodies that are so GLAD to see me... me. 
• is waking up to two funny little babies dragging their bodies up from the end of the bed to lick my face... tail wagging the whole way.
• is having someone to share a blanket with on the big chair.
• is having a built in security system. Nothing gets by these girls.
• is funny little noises and crazy loud barks.
• is ears twitching and noses moving.
• is puppy feet and wagging tails.
• is love. So much love.

My Heart Is Tired

My heart is tired. There are so many things weighing on me lately and I am just really having a hard time dealing with all of the stress. I can tell that the stress is taking a toll on me. I walk into a room and forget what I was doing. I do that all the time now. I will be in the middle of a sentence and forget where I was going with it. I can't ever finish one thing before I start another. I am worn out.
I keep being put in the middle of situations that I don't want to be... that I shouldn't be in. I want to be there for people, but I simply can only take so much. I am only one person.
I worry a lot. I used to never worry about anything. Well, that's a lie. I worried but things didn't eat at me the way they do now. Now I just get things in my head and just can't leave them alone. I even wake up in the middle of the night thinking about something I meant to do and didn't and how it is going to make something else messed up. Ugh.
I want to be positive again. I want to be upbeat again. I want to be happy. Not that I'm not happy. I wouldn't say I'm unhappy, just stressed. There's more to do in one day than there could ever be time for. I don't have time for me and I don't have time to finish everything I need to do. I mean, I feel like I can't give 100% to anything I do because I don't have it to give. I feel like if something does get 100% then something else gets about 10% or nothing. It's frustrating.

Ok. Enough complaining. I'm done with being negative. I need to go back to not dwelling on the negative. I need to be more positive. I will work on that.

My Own Little World By Matthew West

In my own little world it hardly ever rains

I’ve never gone hungry or always felt safe

I got some money in my pocket shoes on my feet

In my own little world

Population me

I try to stay awake through the Sunday morning church

I throw a twenty in the plate but I never give ’til it hurts

and I turn off the news when I don’t like what I see

it’s easy to do when it’s

population me
courtesy OriginaLyric.Info

What if there’s a bigger picture

what if I’m missing out

What if there’s a greater purpose

I could be living right now

outside my own little world

Stopped at the red light, looked out my window

Outside the car, saw a sign, said “Help this homeless widow”

Just above this sign was the face of a human

I thought to myself, “God, what have I been doing?”

So I rolled down my window and I looked her in the eye

Oh how many times have I just passed her by

I gave her some money then I drove on through

in my own little world there’s

Population two

What if there’s a bigger picture

what if I’m missing out

What if there’s a greater purpose

I could be living right now

outside my own little world

Start breaking my heart for what breaks Yours

give me open hands and open doors

put Your light in my eyes and let me see

that my own little world is not about me

I think that's changing... I can tell. I can tell that my own little world which was made up of myself, my husband, and the MilShelb now (CRAZILY) includes fifteen other people. Fifteen people who depend on me daily to do the right thing... to be there... to believe in them. I'm learning just what it means to be a teacher... it means that these kids become an important part of your world.

This Crazy Life I Lead

You know, life is crazy. I think most people will agree with me on this. Life has a way of taking crazy turns and knocking you down at times you can't take it... and picking you up when you least expect the help. Life is nuts.
All that said, I never cease to be amazed at the things life throws my way. I am continuing to learn just how unpredictable life is. Each and every day something new is thrown at me. I have days when I am worn out. Days when I simply cannot take any more... and then someone says something to wake me back up, pick me up, and push me to keep going.
I am a blessed person. I am truly blessed beyond belief. I'm not referring to material things- though I am blessed in that way as well, I am referring to the people in my life. I am surrounded by people who pick me up and keep me going. I am surrounded by people who "get me". They know me. They love me. They understand me.
I am making friends at work... finally. I am starting to feel that I fit in and am not looked at as such an outcast. I am finding my rhythm in life... finding a routine and settling down.
You know, with all that positive stuff going on, there is still so much negative and so many things to overcome. I am having a hard time overlooking the bad some days and focusing on the good.
There are days when I just want to give up... thrown in the towel and say, "I've given all I've got. I'm done." I do say it to myself sometimes... but the next morning I get out of bed and go through another day and I make it.
I am learning that sometimes it is ok to just get through the day. I don't have to be in love with my life all the time. I don't have to look at the "upside" all the time. It's ok to be disappointed. Stuff happens and it's ok to deal with it without a smile on my face. What a very un-Maggie-like idea... but, I believe, a very grown up one.
Mostly, I'm satisfied with the fact that I am finding my way. Jake and I are finding our ways. So much around us is changing and some of it is for the better and some of it is not, but we are still going strong. I figure as long as we stick together, there's really nothing I cannot handle. I sure do love that man...